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A Series of Left Turns:: Chapter 16

This one is NSFW so click carefully!

A whole weekend. A whole weekend away from each other and that’s the last conversation we had to have.

I must have the shittiest timing in the world, right?

God. I can’t get the image of those deep blue, tear-filled eyes out of my head. I can’t shake the guilt of how much what I said hurt him. The look in his eyes, when I told him I had no feelings for him.

He repeated that to me, too… That I said I felt nothing…

As I re-enter my house I waste no time heading towards my room. I walk straight up the stairs not wanting to look at or talk to anybody.

God, I fucked up.

I shut the door behind me as soon as I’m in. With a sigh I toss my hat to the ground, hanging my head as I lean against the wall astride the door.

To say I don’t feel anything; I know that’s an exaggeration. But if I pulled back on that statement I think I would’ve hurt him more. And really… I played with his feelings enough, haven’t I? All that hesitation from me, that lack of response, that lack of feeling, even when he tried to hold me. When I was still ‘trying.’

Jesus Christ, I hurt him. I hurt him and I barely even thought anything of it. How could I do that? How could I just treat my best friend like he’s nothing? How could I be so wrapped up in myself that I don’t even notice that I’m hurting him?

I’m thrown out my thoughts when a hand takes my chin and tilts it up. Ice blue eyes meet mine, peering down at me.

“Guess you did it,” Cartman says.

I hold my gaze, eyebrows still tight from frustration and sigh. “…Yeah.”

Those mischievous eyes of his lower as he leans in close. “Atta boy,” He whispers against my lips.

He crushes our lips together and my heart skyrockets.