askthemainfour:

The Finale

This is the final part of the epilogue. There are two other parts of the epilogue you can read. One about Heathers and one about Patty. Enjoy~

After the Heathers play ends, Graduation is very close by. Kyle decides that he needs to focus more on seriously looking at colleges he wants to enter. He tells Cartman, and eventually Cartman tells the blog, that he and Cartman need to take a break.

Kyle disappears for a long time. He’s very inactive on the blog. If the audience were to ask anyone about him, Stan would answer, saying he’s focusing on studies. Cartman would still be on the blog, but would hang out a lot more with Kenny instead, and people would start to notice he would start smoking pot.

After a week or two of this, Kenny talks to Kyle in private and tells him that Cartman is incredibly invested in Kyle. Kyle takes a few more days to think about this, but does eventually come back to Cartman.

Kyle’s justification for this is despite everything that’s happened between them Cartman hasn’t bailed on Kyle, so Kyle can’t bail on Cartman. Of course the audience would probably question this and try to fuck with Kyle’s head, but Kyle would just ignore those anons.

A few days before Kyle’s birthday, Kyle can finally take the cast off. (This is around the time the BJ offscreenpost would take place.)

The Stalker

The blog harassment becomes more targeted towards Kyle and Cartman’s relationship, talking about how Kyle should not trust Cartman and that he’s an idiot for thinking that anyone can fix Cartman. That he’ll always be a deranged, broken human being.

Kyle attempts to track the IP of the stalker. When he does find the IP he realizes the person is close enough to leech off of Cartman’s internet. Cartman becomes increasingly unnerved by this information, but doesn’t make it public to the blog.

As mentioned in a previous post, Bebe is Cartman’s spy, and Cartman is certain that this stalker is a girl. He dubs the stalker the “locker stalker” jokingly in front of the blog, but is hellbent on finding the girl and making her pay. He tells Bebe to focus on both Patty and Wendy.

Wendy is much easier to track for Bebe since they’re such close friends, and Bebe quickly confirms that while Wendy does watch the blog a lot and talk a lot of shit, she never goes near Cartman’s house or writes anons of any kind. Just gossips to her friends about Cartman’s stupid blog.

Patty’s lead is much more distracting to Cartman, but Bebe can’t seem to find any substantial evidence. Cartman almost wants to get Kyle in on it, but Bebe thinks talking about it openly between his group might make things more complicated. Cartman asks her why, and Bebe says she gets a bad feeling about it.  

She mostly just wants to drop the issue. Cartman eventually concedes and lets it go.

Future Plans

As Graduation draws closer, the main four starts to talk about what they plan to do with their lives. Kenny decides that he’s going to jump straight into being a police officer in South Park. Stan is going to move to the west coast with his family and study marine biology, while also taking up a job to brace for his eventual child. Kyle is going to New York to major in computer programming, since it’s always been such a natural skill for him and he already knows how to develop software – having made that tracking system in order to find Cartman. Cartman is also moving to New York to major in Musical Theatre.

Shortly after making this knowledge public, an untagged post pops up in the middle of the night:

“Hello Internet,

This may seem a bit sudden… but… as you all may have heard, Eric wants to move to New York. Thats… a very BAD idea. New york is full of dangerous people. And Eric is drawn to danger. He always gets himself into trouble. That Trent boy… who didn’t really harm anyone… Eric felt the need to bring guns into the picture. He locked him and his friends in bomb shelter for weeks and then went missing. He worried everyone sick, over this boy who was most likely just going to deliver a few punches and then leave them alone… and to top it all off… he got that poor Trent boy killed. Imagine if he ran into any old outspoken New Yorker. He would take their outlandish behavior as a challenge. And he would get himself thrown in jail. I don’t want that for Eric. But he won’t listen to me. Please, do whatever you can to stop Eric from going to New York.”

The post is deleted shortly afterwards, minutes after. Inevitably an audience member would mention it, and the four would be very confused. Well, sort of. As soon as Kyle does some tampering and is able to recover the deleted post, Cartman reads it and automatically knows who it is.

He waits that night for his Mother to come home. Kyle waits with him.

Liane’s Confession

Liane when she walks through the door is noticeably buzzed. Cartman hesitates for a moment, but then aggravatingly confronts her. He tells her that she has no right going onto his blog and making posts. Liane tells her son that she knows what’s best for him and he doesn’t belong in New York – that he needs her more than he thinks he does.

They have a back and forth about this, Liane listing all the types of things that she’s done for him in the past that no other Mother would have done, and Cartman starting to list off all the negligence that he faced that ‘no other mother would have done.’ He also brings up that his whole reason for being born was to be a tool in Liane’s plan to trap a guy into a relationship with her, and Liane denies this saying that she was glad to raise him.

Kyle watches from the sidelines, not really wanting to get involved in an argument that he doesn’t know half of. Liane doesn’t seem to notice that he’s there.

Cartman snaps and finally accuses his Mother of being the stalker. That it’d be so easy to find his locker and locker combination if his Mother just asked the school staff. And of course she could describe the inside of his house and have the IP constantly be circling their house.

Liane continuously denies this. Cartman refuses to believe his Mother and blows up at her, calling her a sick and twisted person and accusing her of trying to break him and Kyle up. They’re in each other’s faces yelling at each other, Liane feeling bolder than she would usually be because she’s drunk. The shouting escalates a bit further until Liane grabs Cartman’s face and tells him that she loves him more than anything, and she begs him not to leave her alone, that she needs him.

Cartman shoves Liane away from him, looking utterly disgusted. He goes into his room and starts packing his bags. He tells Kyle that he’s moving out, and he doesn’t care where he has to go. He just says that he has to get away from his Mom or he might do something he regrets.

Kyle seems taken aback by that, but helps him moves out.

The Damage

Once things settle down and Liane stops trying to find out where Cartman is, Cartman decides to bunk in Stan’s basement until graduation. Kyle offered to house him, but Cartman said it would be too obvious. And at one point, Liane did try to go to Kyle’s house and find Cartman.

Liane tries contacting the police a few times to find Cartman, but with how many times the Cartman household has contacted the police over the years, they hardly take her calls seriously anymore.

For a month and a half Cartman falls into a depression and experiences night terrors and pukes through anxiety attacks. He jokes that it’s the curse of the Marsh household making him puke. Kyle comes over a lot to try and talk to him, but Cartman doesn’t say much.

After being reclusive for so long Cartman gets a job and begins to pay Randy rent. He makes himself more useful around the house to make up for his period of depression and all sheet-ruining puke he  When Graduation comes, Liane tries to get Cartman to come back home, but he avoids her like the plague. The four of them earn their diplomas, Kenny needing extra help from Kyle and Stan to graduate, but also pulling through.

Parting Ways

Stan moves west to California. Kyle, Cartman and Kenny room in a cheap duplex together. Kenny is MIA most of them time except to pay bills and eat from time to time.

Patty has Stan’s son in California and sends pictures and videos.

After a gap year, Cartman and Kyle move to Queens and start their college semesters. Once he’s in a more financially comfortable position, Cartman starts seeing a therapist. It takes him a few pushes from Kyle to stay consistent with it, but he does it.

Kenny stays in South Park, makes amends with Butters. They become roommates, but strictly friends with benefits.

And that’s about where the blog’s story ends. Thanks for sticking around to read!